Prayer and What's Related

I pray and pray and pray, and nothing ever happens. I pray for a second chance at getting to know you. Then I pray to meet someone like you. Someone who wants to think and change. Someone who loves books and art and music. Someone my size and cute. Someone who seems as perfect for me as you do. But then I think of how wretched I am and how wretched you probably are. I can't stand myself, and you probably can't stand yourself, so how could we stand each other? I think of how hopeless love is and am relieved. I am relieved that my prayers will go unanswered or at least unfulfilled. I don't want to be alone, but I don't want to hurt anyone. I suppose my only hope is the restorative love of Christ. But this love I've yet to see.

Oh, my God.

Catharsis

I look at what I've done and want to puke. This is getting stupid.